When it comes to sending deliciously dirty messages, many people have no idea where to begin. That’s why we’ve put together this list of sexting tips to get you started. Let’s dive in!
1. FORGET THE ROADMAP
There are no magic words that will get your sexting partner turned on… it’s more complex than that. Everyone is different, so what turns on one person may turn off another. It’s more of finding the right combination of time, place, and content for your particular sexting partner.
2. START SLOWLY
Don’t jump into hot, heavy, and crude too fast. Take time to build up the sexual tension – like a trail of sexy breadcrumbs.
If you just finished a date with your girlfriend or boyfriend and immediately start sexting, then you’re missing the point. Sexting helps build up the sexual tension before meeting up. Even with single, gentle sentences.
It can be used, essentially, as modern-day foreplay. You can tease and talk dirty with each other all day- so by the time you see each other, you’ll want to rip each other’s clothes off.
3. STAY IN YOUR COMFORT ZONE
Don’t spout graphic content unless it’s something you would normally do anyway. All you need to do is step it up a notch – anything else will show your struggle and not be as hot as you hope. However, this is a double-edged sword – one you need to think about who is on the other side of the conversation. If your partner isn’t someone who likes porn-heavy terms, then you need to respect that (and it won’t light their fires).
4. CHOOSE YOUR WORDS WISELY
You’re not aiming for Hemmingway or even Harlequin novels, but your vernacular should include a healthy dose of VERBS and adjectives, not to mention the appropriate nouns (think “pussy” not “vagina”), we’re not at medical school. If you need some help in this department, this guide on “50 Dirty Talk Phrases – A Beginner’s Guide” will help.
5. KEEP THINGS SIMPLE
Don’t let texts get too long. Break them up and spread them out in time to make your partner quiver with anticipation. Besides, no one wants to read an entire essay in one sitting. Believe it or not, people can get tired of even a wall of sexy text.
6. TEXT AT THE RIGHT TIME
Don’t send a racy photo when you know they are in a meeting. Send a sexy text-only message if you really need to get them horny. And on the note of photos ….
Unless you’re 100% sure they’re not going to be a dick down the line and make them public, only send nudes that don’t include your face.
7. TURN OFF AUTOCORRECT
Giggling and grinning during a sexting session is cool, but not because you’ve accidentally sent, “I want to duck you so hard.” However, don’t have crappy spelling or grammar.
And don’t use abbreviations.
No. Just no.
8. AVOID DRUNK SEXTING
When drunk, we are not as sexy as we think we are. Not to mention it makes the situation ripe for other embarrassing mistakes like oversharing, expressing “I’ll die for you” levels of love, or even calling someone by your ex’s name.
9. KEEP YOUR PROMISES
Actually, do what you say you’re going to do. If nothing else, don’t go overboard with fantasies that aren’t possible. Like, “I’m going to do you on a pile of money I stole from the bank.” But if you say you’re going to give them an erotic massage that will take all evening – yeah, you better keep that promise. Well, unless of course you doing a mutual anonymous thing and will never see each other. Then, I guess this is one of the sexting tips that doesn’t count.
10. STAY AWAY FROM EMOJIS
No. I don’t care how much the “point + ok sign” makes you giggle like a 4th grader. 99.9999% of the time, they’re just not cool to put in. And if you think you’ve found the .0001%, chances are you’re still in the other group.
11. INCLUDE THEM
Get them to message you back. Don’t make it a one-sided event – even though it can be easy to get lost in your own head and your own fantasies. One simple way is to ask questions. One BIG way is to play games. If you need sexting game ideas, here’s a great article to help you out.
12. CHANGE UP LOCATIONS
Don’t just sext during your day off or when you’re bored on the commute to work. Message when they least expect it. But if you know it’s when they’ll be at work, make sure you have a system in place that they don’t get in trouble.
Any sexting tips you want to add? Share in the comments!
