It might sound like a very simple definition, but with the ever-changing concepts of sex and sexuality in recent years, it doesn’t hurt to revisit the idea. Let’s start with a basic dictionary definition…
SEXUALITY [ sek-shoo-al-i-tee or, esp. British, seks-yoo- ]
Noun
- Sexual character; possession of the structural and functional traits of sex.
- Recognition of or emphasis upon sexual matters.
- Involvement in sexual activity.
- An organism’s preparedness for engaging in sexual activity.
WIKIPEDIA says this … “Human sexuality is the way people experience and express themselves sexually. This involves biological, erotic, physical, emotional, social, or spiritual feelings and behaviors.”
They continue by adding…
“Because it is a broad term, which has varied over time, it lacks a precise definition.”
THE PROBLEM
People HATE broad definitions, especially when it comes to something close to them or possibly linked to their identity. Precise terms make people feel more comfortable because it involves no deep thought – whether this is right or wrong is a different discussion.
This also leads to another issue – judgment and rejection.
So, one simple word, now, and for a long time, carries quite a big punch and a mountain for burden and pain for more than a few people.
ACCEPTING YOUR SEXUALITY
One of the most interesting comparisons I’ve seen is comparing being sexuality to baldness.
Just stay with me here. I promise it will make sense.
We can’t control being bald. It can also be a shot in the self-esteem and personal identity for those who associate a full head of hair with everything that’s positive. But, if you ask anyone, accepting the receding hairline, and shaving that sucker off, ends up looking way better – and often totally sexy. It can be embraced as something great.
Granted, it’s not the BEST parallel, but it’s far easier to associate and understand.
Our sexuality is something that is part of us – not something we can change or take away for others’ comfort (unlike the easy haircut). It can be hard to accept at times, but that comes from fear of rejection and pain from those you hold close or even people in general.
Learning to be at peace with your sexuality can take years for some people – even a life long journey that only makes sense in the very end. For others, it’s clear from a very young age.
ACCEPTING OTHER’S SEXUALITY
I see similarities with acceptance when it comes to BDSM practices or kinks in general. People think that because you love flogging that your friend must automatically love flogging and you’re going to flog them all day long whether they like it or not.
Get where I’m going?
Just because someone has a different sexuality than you (whether orientation, libido, etc.) doesn’t mean you have to be the same. It’s not a contagion or a commandment. I’m friends with transgenders, drag queens, crossdressers, straights, gays, you name it. I even have one friend who identifies as a kitten. We can love them for their individuality just like we want to be loved for ours.
That’s it.
Just a little overview and update with a few personal cents thrown in.
Want more interesting articles, you might like these…
- What’s Different With Transgender Sex Toys? And Why We Need More
- What is a BDSM Top Vs a Dominant? Learn the Big Difference
- Sex and Colors – Learn What Hues Spark Passion and Which Kill It
What are your thoughts on sexuality? Share in the comments.
