No matter the decade or class level, there will always be plenty of sex ed horror stories that stay with that person for as long as they live.
There’s everything from insane teaching, extreme honesty, bananas accidents, and everything in between. Reddit has a few threads that have exploded with everyone sharing their stories.
Here are a few…
Shirt Example
“My sex ed teacher brought a kid who was wearing a shirt with too-long sleeves up to the front of the classroom and proceeded to explain what an uncircumcised penis looks like.” —u/aliveinjoburg2
Barry White
“It was in ninth-grade health with Mr. Lamb. Dude was an absolute gem of a human being, but his voice sounded exactly like Barry White. Like all the time. So any time he tried to say anything remotely sexual, it sounded like the voiceover for a raunchy R&B song.
This obviously made us freshmen erupt in laughter. Constantly. Poor guy just couldn’t get through a lesson for three straight weeks.” —u/Exandrus
Sticky Situation
“In the middle of a lesson explaining tampons and sanitary towels one girl asked which way up a pad was meant to be used. It received a collective wince from the other girls in the room as we all imagined a pad being used sticky side up.” – rachaeld4ce7786fe
Curtain and Drapes
“When I was in middle school sex-ed class, the teacher separated the boys and girls. In order for our respective sexes to come up with a list of questions that we had for the other. When we all came back and began asking each other questions, one boy asked, “Do red-headed girls have red-headed pubic hair?”
“I was the only red-headed girl in the class and so all 24 pairs of eyes, including the teacher, turned to me for the answer. I had to talk about my pubic hair in front of a large group of 13-year-olds who now all know that the curtains do indeed match the drapes.” – hjbunnylord
Magic Wand
My health teacher’s most common catchphrase was, “It’s not how long the wand is, it’s the magic that you make with it that counts,” which she would say as she pointed towards one of the boys in the room. – mossgrass12
Blow and Tell
“My sex ed teacher—who doubled as the gym teacher—told us never to believe a guy when he says a condom won’t fit. To demonstrate, she pulled a condom around her head and over her nose so that she could blow it up like a balloon with her nostrils. Now I know that condoms can fit anyone.”
Spoiled Rotten
“Everyone had the same sex-ed teacher in my high school. One day, he had all of his classes practice putting a condom on a banana—but he used the same banana each time. When my class showed up, the fruit was turned to complete mush! We wanted to laugh at the situation, but he threatened us with detention if any of us.
Peanut Butter Cup
“I grew up in a small town in GA. And, I do not remember learning much about actual “safe sex”. I do remember, however, my teacher passing out an “abstinence card” and I was made to sign it. Promising that I wouldn’t have sex until marriage.
I also remember my teacher passing a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup around class, telling us to “do whatever we wanted to it”. People had licked it, thrown it on the ground, stuck their pencil into it, etc. She claimed that “having sex with more than one person is exactly the same. No one wants to eat this peanut butter cup. So, why would someone want to have sex with you if you have been ‘passed around.’”
If I didn’t have such a wonderful mother who wasn’t embarrassed or ashamed to really teach me what’s up with sex, I would be clueless right now. ~ Rachel Puleo, 22
Embarrassed Beth
During our sex education day one of the classes was taught by a specialist who had a very impressive collection of realistic dildos to demonstrate how to put on a condom. She put one at the front and asked people to come up and volunteer to show how to put on a condom.
My (now ex) boyfriend volunteered first and took FIFTEEN MINUTES to open the damn condom package. The entire time, people were shouting up at him. With things about me like “Beth is getting bored” and “She’ll fall asleep at this rate”. It was awful, and the teacher did absolutely nothing to stop them. In the end, it took him 25 minutes to get the condom anywhere near the dildo and even then it was inside out.
Laying Eggs
“When I was a senior in high school, a guy I had a crush on pulled me aside one day and asked, ‘So when a girl has her period, she just lays an egg in the toilet, right?’ I’ll be honest. I’m not sure if I answered him or just stared at him.” —u/artemis1860. It’s not just “up there” in the sex ed horror stories category, it’s right in the “mortifying” category as well.
In-Class Excitement
“In eighth-grade sex ed we were watching a graphic video of a woman giving birth. Graphic as in the camera was pointed right at the woman’s vagina while she was giving birth. My friend next to me nudged my foot. She discreetly directed my attention to the loner who never talked to anyone in the back of the class.
He was watching the video with his hands down his pants, pleasuring himself. We both turned back to the front of the class, wide-eyed, and made eye contact with our instructor. She looked at us and mouthed, “I know.””– horsebeast
Any of your own sex ed horror stories you want to add? Share in the comments!
